Mad World
by MissCloud
Summary: [Songfic] Hinted suicide. Kai is freed from Biovolt. But why isn't he happy?


**Hello, this is another one-shot of mine. I decided to make it a song fic, and the particular song I have chosen is for a reason; It's called Mad World by Tears for Fears, and Gary Jules(whose version is the best) it's an unhappy, suicide song. The fic is to do with Kai and unhappiness, which too many of us seem to suffer from. The fic is in Kai's point of view and is expressing his feelings over his freedom at Biovolt. It may seem exaggerated. (May be changed a bit later. Haven't decided whether I'm totally happy with it yet.) Please leave a review. Thankies.**

**Mad World  
**One-Shot

I held my head high, strutting down that corridor of horrors, being led to my absolute _freedom_. But inside, I was dying. The slaves sat helplessly against the walls, beaten, terrified, unable to find their dignity that was stolen from them in front of their very eyes. Their faces lacking happiness and filled with no hope, their cuts and bruises torturing me to look away.

_All around me are familiar faces  
Worn out places, worn out faces  
Bright and early for their daily races  
Going nowhere, going nowhere_

And all this time I wondered. Why was I free? Why was I able to go home to the depths of my mansion, when I knew what these suffered. I held my neck, nightmares flashing back to me of the purple bruises I received. The blood I shed. The pain. One wonders, is the right way to live being used as laboratory rats, then when unneeded, useless, chucked away like a useless nothing. _Nothing. _Is that all I am?

Their tears are filling up their glasses  
No expression, no expression  
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow  
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

I stared at their faces, as they seemed to message me with a beg. They knew they had no future. Only the best were to go free from their slavery, and in to the world of what were trained to do, all along. Was beyblading really all that? If it was worth unhappiness? Deep within their souls, did they want to die, I could only wonder? There was no tomorrow for them. Just another day. _Tomorrow _was different. And I would finally seize my own.

_  
And I find it kinda funny  
I find it kinda sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had_

I have longed for this day to come. I imagined it, fantasized of my happiness. But something's a miss. It's not quite what I expected. Why aren't I happy? Why do I feel for these losers? I'm supposed to have everything. But I feel I have nothing. My body is empty, no love, no passion. The feeling of being unloved had never vanished from my mind. Knowing there is no reason for you to exist. Only battle until you're on the verge of death. Was all that pain really worth it? _Really?_

_  
I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take  
When people run in circles  
It's a very, very mad world mad world_

The door of exposure to the blue sky I have only seen numerous times greets me with a rotten, wooden touch- and before I pull the handle, I stop to run my fingers down the fingernail marks on the door. I remember the voices. The screams of the children who had tried to escape that day, but they were caught by guards, and they tried with all their might and power to grip the door by the sweat on their hands. They were dragged down the corridor to one of the torture rooms. I never slept that night. Their screams of agony still corrupt my dreams. My pillow is still wet, blood-stained, and I turn my head to glance back at the unfortunates.

_  
Children waiting for the day they feel good  
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday  
Made to feel the way that every child should  
Sit and listen, sit and listen_

How can I live with myself? Knowing what went on here. I feel apart of me has been left to rotten, impaled to the ground and still being kicked as I suffer. I should be happy, but I can't. It happened to me. To all of us. Yet I can't do shit about it. Is that something you would do? Forget? Everything lies in my mind. My memory. My dreams are stained with blood that won't rub away. _Won't rub away. _As hard as I try. It's sticking with me. The horror doesn't die.

_  
Went to school and I was very nervous  
No one knew me, no one knew me  
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson  
Look right through me, look right through me_

I was told my future leads to victory. _Victory?_ I spit at the words. _Victory?! _My life roams to wherever someone else leads me. My low spirit lies crestfallen in my stomach. _That_ feeling. It can't be explained. I don't know what happiness feels like so how am I to know when it comes to me? If this is what happiness feels like then is life just a joke? My wrists are slit and my head is in shambles, but somehow something seems worth to _go._

_  
And I find it kinda funny  
I find it kinda sad  
The dreams in which I'm dying  
Are the best I've ever had_

What does it feel like to be told you're loved? I lower my head towards the others, watching their pain. There's nothing I can do. Once I go.

_  
I find it hard to tell you  
I find it hard to take  
When people run in circles  
It's a very, very mad world  
Enlarge your world  
Mad world _

_Once I go._


End file.
